okay so, as a fangirl. You have to spend 28 hours queuing for concert tickets and 21 hours for the actual concert. You spend the night outside a shopping mall in orchard and get bitten by a gazillion amount of mosquitoes and you run to 7/11 to buy ice to stop the itch. Yes, you do have to run, because you only have 15 minutes or else. say byebye to your previous efforts, you'll be out of the queue. You sleep outside the singapore indoor stadium, like someone with no home to return to. As a fangirl, you must be smart i realised, please always remember to bring a mat with you. I ended up having to ask the people behind me if i could borrow a small space of their mat to rest my head and the rest of my body was on the floor. And I still managed to sleep. amazing. Oh and I had school that day. as well as tuition. But at the end of the day, or night? you find yourself smiling. and sweating, and grinning non-stop because you just wasted 49 hours of your life to meet super junior for 3 hours ^^

And exactly how did I spend those 49 hours? Worrying, highing, talking, sleeping, flailing, listening to music, stoning, staring into space, fantasizing, thinking of all sorts of things that might happen in the concert, hyperventilate and all that shit yeah.

As a fangirl, you must have a bias group, and a bias in your bias group. or you find yourself not enjoying fandom at all. And of course, you must be careful not to fall in love with too many groups, or else, scary fangirls are everywhere to point their fingers at you and call you a traitor, say that you're not fit to be in so and so fanclub, you should just gtfo and yeah, those kind of things ^^

As a fangirl, you scarifice your sleep to stay up and say happy birthday to someone that can't even hear you. type out a dedication to that someone that wouldn't look at it, and uh, can't even understand it. you sacrifice your time to study to spazz, to read fanfics, to check for updates, to watch all sorts of videos, to visit random websites like kpopsecrets.

As a fangirl, you learn terminologies that no one else out of the fandom will understand. such as. butthurt, OTL, ide, smh, imo, ship, stan, otp, op, s!b, gdi etc.

and you'll never know that BoA actually has a fanclub with a rather hilarious name: Jumping BoA. And you'll never know that names of fanclubs, and that fanclub colours are serious business.

And you find yourself creeped out by yourself because gdi, I can actually recognise heechul's lips, ryeowook's nose and godknows what else. Like I can't even see their face, just part of it and i go: o, that's ryeowook. and hell, i'm right :/

And then you have moments where you find yourself obsessing over another group, and you get thrown into a frenzy, because NUUUUU YOU CAN'T BE UNFAITHFUL. >< Yeah. things like that, and then you get over them and go back to your original bias group. And then you immediately turn your head when you overhear other people (it doesn't matter whether you know them or not) are talking about kpop/suju.

Oh yeah, and you also fetch idols from airports and fall down and have your idol stand in front of you for 10 seconds, and you make that the best 10 seconds of your life.

You waste god knows how much on albums, posters and merchandises too :) And you talk to yourself, and godknows what else.

Oh yes, you find yourself crying too, because of shit that happens to the group, and because when they cry, you cry, when they laugh, you laugh, when they smile, you smile, when they're being retarded, you laugh like a retard.

At the end of the day, you ask yourself, why they shit am i doing all these. But it doesnt matter, because. you still go back to fandom anyway. There are times where you want to leave the fandom for good, but damn, it's just impossible, and you marvel at other people that actually manage to leave.

As a fangirl, your life revolves around your idols 24/7.

Do I regret getting into fandom?

Never, sadly.