Monday, January 31, 2011
I would write a fan account. but lets just forget it.
Super Show 3 was just plain amazing. Let's just say it's even better than ss2 that i went last year in march. haha, of course ss2 was awesome too!
I QUEUED UP FOR 21 HOURS. FOR MY FIRST ROW IN MOSH PIT! NO ONE TO BLOCK ME. I WAS THE CLOSEST TO THE STAGE. SIWON WORE HIS SHIRT RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. HEECHUL MADE EYE CONTACT WITH ME. RYEOWOOK STOOD IN FRONT OF ME AND WAVED TO US. (ME) Siwon's fanservice is amazing. I WITNESSED SO MANY EUNHAE MOMENTS. DONGHAE KNELT DOWN AND EUNHYUK OPENED HIS BLAZER FOR HIM. OH MY GOD. and yesung's voice almost killed me. We sang along with it has to be you and i was damn pissed at the fan behind me that couldnt sing the right lyrics -,- and kyuhyun's voice was just amazing too. i died even more during in my dream. because of yesung's voice once again. and donghae's voice. gosh. and sungmin and ryeowook and kyuhyun. THEY SANG HATE U LOVE U. OH MY GOD. HEECHUL. HEECHUL. HEECHUL. IS AMAZING. I LOVE THIS MAN. SO. FREAKING. MUCH. I love him so much. how is it possible for someone to look so manly with pretty short hair and a casual tee and black pants. AND THEN LOOK SO AMAZINGLY PRETTY WHEN CROSS DRESSED AS LADY GAGA. he's amazing. I love him. so. much. I can't get enough of him really.
The second show. okay. these people. got free tickets. won tickets. queued up for less than an hour. and they got to touch suju or whatever. I don't know whether i should feel jealous or not. All I can say is that. i feel proud that i'm a dedicated E.L.F. that queued up for 49 hours in total for this whole concert. 28 hours for tickets and 21 hours for the concert itself. I feel proud of myself. I don't care what other people think. I did what i could for suju already. I love them so much. They love me (us) too. Elf. Petal. I'll never regret getting into kpop (suju).
btw. FIRST ROW IS REALLY AWESOME. my legs didnt die somehow after jumping on 4 inch heels for 3 hours.
sorry to say this. but i really can't feel that you're jealous. I don't even regard you as a suju fan. laugh. if you really were. it wouldn't be like this. I'm okay with you. But please don't talk to me about suju as if you love them so much. because you don't. I don't feel it. AT ALL.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
5:26 PM
Thursday, January 27, 2011
HEECHUL. AND LEETEUK. ARE FREAKING FREAKING FREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKING IN SINGAPORE NOW. AND I DIDN'T GO AND FETCH THEM.
I DIDNT GO AND FETCH HEECHUL. I FEEL LIKE KILLING MYSELF. LIKE TOTALLY.
AND THEY'RE IN SINGAPORE NOW. AND IM SITTING AT HOME TYPING HERE. TRYING TO DO MY SS GRADED. BUT ALL I CAN THINK OF IS THEM. KIM HEECHUL MY BIAS FOR 20 MONTHS. IN SINGAPORE. MY COUNTRY. AND ALL IM DOING. IS SITTING AT HOME. WHAT THE FUCK. I NEED TO MURDER MYSELF. HEEECHULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
OH NOOOOO. WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME. I'LL TOTALLY NOT BE ABLE TO CONCENTRATE TOMORROW IN SCHOOL. HE'S FREAKING IN SINGAPORE. MY LOVE IS IN SINGAPORE. WALKING AROUND THE STREETS. OR PERHAPS JUST SITTING IN HIS HOTEL ROOM. DAMN. AND THERE'S LIKE YAN JIANG GAO. AND WHAT. CRYSALIDS QUIZ. WHATEVER MAN. I DONT CARE. I DON'T CARE ABOUT MUTANTS OR DEVIATION OR WHAT GRADUATION SPEECH. I JUST NEED TO SEE HEECHUL. AND TELL HIM HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM. I FEEL LIKE PONNING SCHOOL TOMORROW. I FEEL LIKE RUNNING OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW TO GO AND FIND THEM. KIM HEECHUL. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY SANITY. I'M FUCKING GOING CRAZY NOW. SERIOUSLY. HEECHUL.
I WENT TO THE INDOOR STADIUM TO CHECK OUT THE PLACE TODAY. IT WAS A HELLA FRUITFUL TRIP.
KIM HEECHUL. YOU'RE IN SINGAPORE NOW. WE'RE SO CLOSE YET SO FAR. I NEED YOU IN MY LIFE. GODAMN. NOW YOU'RE HERE. BUT. I CAN'T GO TO YOU. KIM HEECHUL. I LOVE YOU. SO. DAMN. FUCKING. MUCH. YOU. WILL. NEVER. KNOW.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
9:06 PM
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Till now, if there is something that puzzles me, it is not geometrical proofs or trigonometry, but instead why the new girls tend to say that coming to st. nicks is the worst choice they had made in their life. Of course I'm not saying all of them say that, but well, many? most?
They say that the school system sucks, perhaps, maybe it does. I don't know why I don't feel it. Maybe because I'm from st. nicks primary? so maybe they have a similar system and after 6 years in sn primary. I don't feel much after coming to secondary school, except for the piling homework and never ending tests and exams. I think that sn made who I am today. Although I still laugh when they go on and on about what sisterly love, dignity for all, create and celebrate, lead and serve, learn from life and gratitude and humility? (oh wow, i memorised them.) I think that 9 years back, choosing to study in st. nicks. was the best choice I've ever made so far in the fifteen years of my life. Perhaps, if i went to a different school, my social circle might be wider, i may have more guy friends or whatever, but I don't regret coming to st. nicks. I love the staircases in the school, the mirrors they hang all around in school because they want us to always look 溫文爾雅 and 高貴大方. (talking about the old campus btw.) I love the ponds in the school. the 飲水思源 pond. Where I used to throw coins in all the time to wish for a hundred marks in spelling .___. guess what. I used to throw coins down the school building to the little hill at the back leading to the secondary section too，making silly wishes. yeah right, like throwing coins down a pond or a hill will grant your wish. haha, well. those were the times :) And the times were we played aeroplane or tying strings whatever. I love the forum, and the 7 pianos we have in school. oh 8? or maybe more. Some of the P1 classrooms have pianos. mine had one! I remember playing a piece for show and tell in primary one. HAHA. I miss the huge toilets with so many big cubicles and so many mirrors and sink. I miss the super big canteen that i took for granted. I only realised how awesome and big the canteen was when we moved to the toa payoh site. that mysterious mirror hanging on the wall of that staircase in the family lounge leading to god knows where. TILL NOW I STILL DON'T KNOW WHERE THAT STAIRCASE LEADS TO. some said principal office, but the staircase is always locked and its so dark and dusty, and i found where the principal office is anyway. getting back to the mirror. they said that if you touch it or whatever you'll get sucked in and you'll never come out. -,- i touched it like 10 times and im still here yo. HAHA. the family lounge is awesome to, we had long long benches where people came in to sell books or cocoa tree chocolates! the living room, the primary staff room, secondary staff room... Carpark 26, Avenue 2 gate, bridge gate, father barre... bus 265. oh and the huge hall that could contain all 4 levels at the same time. and of course the playground, the upper concourse, lower concourse.. and the prayer room. I don't even know how the prayer room in the temporary site looks like. and of course, the classrooms, the big classrooms. I miss everything in the old campus. and the bells! the school bell now is so gross. sigh.
I'll never regret choosing sn. never.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
9:29 PM
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Why do they not hand in stuff by deadlines seriously?
There were reminders more than once ):<
Gen and I had to get photos online and i had to crop the photos and stuff.
Today was quite a tiring day.
actually no la, school passed quite fast as usual, with a retarded useless firedrill (where people were still eating when there's a fire oh wow -,-) during my precious chem lesson. ):< almost one period of chem gone. sigh. bio debate was hilarious. math was just... math. tang didn't come today :) i should get a black earpiece soon. really. HAHA.
went to the doctor after school. 'cause my mum refuses to admit that the stuff on my face are not mosquito bites. OKAY FINE. SO THEY ARE NOT. THEY ARE SOME. ALLERGY THINGY. ):< i think im disfigured already. ): BUT. HAHAHHAHA. ONE WEEK MC FOR PE!
oh don't you just love mc for pe <3
had piano at 5 to 6. then tried to find photos and crop but i ended up leaving house at 7.30pm to amk hub to develop the photos and had late dinner. sigh. went home at 9 and BATHED. WTH BATHE SO LATE ):< rushed out discursive essay. I DON'T THINK IT MAKES SENSE. but whatever. peer editing doesn't even make sense anyway.
CONCERT IN 4 DAYS!!!!!
?You're like a queen and beautiful
11:50 PM
Monday, January 24, 2011
I realised with recess at 11.25am, the school day passes much faster. I don't know why. Maybe cause we used to rest for that 1-2 minutes during prayer, but now, those 1-2 minutes signal the end of our recess break.
I really need to stop being so agitated so easily. I get pissed at the littlest things, at anything and everything. This. sucks. really.
Oh trini, why are you such a bitch?
?You're like a queen and beautiful
10:35 PM
Sunday, January 23, 2011
I've been blogshopping for let's see 2 hours or so?
And I'm totally in love with this Alexa Mini bag. SO. FUCKING. GORGEOUS. MY GOD. but its gone ):< and Alexa clutch is gone too ):<
And then there's this other pretty one but its in like cobalt blue. the bright colour hurts my eyes. if only it comes in black. i'ld buy it right away.
I've been procrastinating for two whole fucking days.
monday, am remedial, piano lesson.
tuesday, go home early and die from a pile of undone work due to procrastination during the weekends.
wednesday, cca- waste 2 hours of my life sitting in the computer lab doing nothing. oh wait. we're having sec 1 orientation. oh so maybe it would be fun.
thursday, em math learning club. i don't think i'ld be attending it -,- waste of time.
friday, am tuition.
and this is how my life. goes on. week after week after week after week after week.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
9:19 PM
Saturday, January 22, 2011
That girl believed that if she continued hoping, maybe one day she would be let out of this cursed place. She does the same things everyday, the same old mundane routine of sleeping, waking up, washing up, eating, studying, completing assignments before the deadline and back to sleeping again. She's going through what everyone is going through. She isn't alone, or so she thinks.
That girl met someone she felt so attracted to, she couldn't understand what was going on. She lives in her own world, where that person and her were all that mattered, where they cuddle together on bed. That person's fingers fitting the spaces between hers perfectly. She doesn't feel lonely anymore, because she has that person.
But one day, in reality, that person took everything away from her. That person left her, all alone. It did hurt, a lot in fact, but that girl decided she should stop dreaming. So she got used to her life where that person was nothing but a mere acquaintance. She stopped believing in that person's lies. She left the world that she created, she abandoned that reality. It took some time for her tears to run dry, but she did it. That person, stopped appearing in her dreams.
That person came back, and that girl was thrown back into a frenzy again. What was she going to do now? Her heart is fluttering again, that familiar feeling of hoping, and then being pushed back to harsh reality, that she didn't matter to that person. When exactly is this girl going to learn how to build a wall so tall that person will never be able to climb over and cause her heart pain again? Maybe, it'll take forever. Or maybe, she'll be able to survive this. She'll be leaving soon anyway. Perhaps, even before she leaves, that person would abandon her again. But this time, it wouldn't hurt that bad. She knew that it wouldn't hurt that bad anymore.
-/
?You're like a queen and beautiful
1:43 PM
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Is it wrong to fall in love with someone of the same gender?
I don't understand you, at all. Why, why do you treat her like this? She might be a little, uncontrollable, but, no. why? Oh well, I don't know anything about it so whatever.
---//
Am I invisible;Why can't you hear me.I'm screaming for you.You never see mewhen our eyes meet.This suffocating feeling in my chest.I can breathe no more.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
8:07 PM
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
the earlier i sleep, the more tired i feel.
what is this ._______.
I don't know what to feel, what to think, what to do, what to question anymore.
Staring, always staring, what should i do.
excuses, always giving the same excuse.
you never see me when our eyes meet.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
7:14 PM
Monday, January 17, 2011
GOODNESS GRACIOUS ME.
I FEEL SO FREE TODAY.
I FINALLY CLEARED MY HOMEWORK DEBT.
NOW, I SHOULD BE STUDYING.
BUT. I'M DOING NOTHING OH NO.
the weather is so good!
i love it when it rains :')
ss3 is coming soon~
@ > @ @ Hyung is in Korea. See you guys soon
@ > @ Welcome back hyung haha I missed you
(cr: @beastlytweets)
MY FANDOM LIFE. IS PERFECT. SERIOUSLY.
AND THEN JUNHYUNG AND HONGKI WERE TALKING TO EACH OTHER HEEHEE.
THEY WENT OUT AGAIN WITH YOSEOB!
oh lovely people.
Guess i should go do some revision!
?You're like a queen and beautiful
6:20 PM
Sunday, January 16, 2011
You’re coming back
I can feel the familiar sting in my heart coming back too
If our story would be a love fiction
The genre would be angst with me staring at you from afar
I’ve gotten used to the routine without you
Without you I was doing great
Why do you have to come back
Raise my hopes sending me to wonderland
only to push me back to hell again
stop doing this to me
I can’t take it anymore
You yearn for my attention yet you push me away
And deny my affections
I want to know how it feels like to have my hands in yours
how we can keep each other warm
and share a kiss under the pouring rain
To feel your soft lips against mine
accompanied with eight precious letters
that hopefully you really mean
Knowing that it won’t happen
the tears run down again
Perhaps I should have confessed
And now I do regret
I can do nothing anymore
the person you know is not me
I’m still awkward and unfamiliar
I can’t be myself when I’m with you
Sorry I know you tried
I blame you for the pain in my heart
when I’m the one at fault
I’m sorry I shouldn’t have thought too much
words you say that mean nothing much
I was the one that thought it meant something special
The suffocating feeling that fills my chest
when you grabbed my hands
I had to hold back the tears
for it meant nothing once again
the silences we share are not comfortable
I wish I could stop thinking about you
We’re just like a blank sheet of paper
nothing between us can be used to fill the spaces up
-//
welcome back.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
9:20 PM
Saturday, January 15, 2011
I love swings.
slept at 10pm last night and woke up at 7am this morning to be healthy and go jogging with sonia ^^
I really liked today.
I like how the silences are not awkward, and we're just friends being retarded together. we ran 3 rounds around bishan stadium. oh man, so fail 3 rounds,7.04mins. BUT. AIYA. SINCE THE HOLIDAYS MY STAMINA ALL GONE. SO NEH MIND LA. SLOWLY TRAIN. TEEHEE. then we took the super long way back to her house so that we can walk more and burn more calories heehee. went to like ruihan's house to ring the bell to see if she's there just to say hi. but apparently she isnt so hahaha. Had a wonderful discovery that playing the swing helps to train thigh muscles on the way back since we found the playgroud and decided to be childish. HAHAHA.
Watched ju-on(the grudge) after that and got totally confused with it. its not even scary -,- its just confusing. and usually wiki would give us all the answers to our questions, but this time it didnt -,- what rika is destined to play out the curse. but isnt she supposed to be dead already -,- it's not even that scary .___________. TOSHIO IS QUITE CUTE ACTUALLY HAHAHAH. and the ghost is so pretty omg. as in uh when it doesnt have horrible eyeliner and stuff.
Went to do math homework after the movie since im epic fail at binomial theorem, but she's fail at teaching -,- so her brother taught me HAHA. Had both breakfast and lunch at her house. :/ feel so pai-seh hahaha.
Played badminton for awhile while waiting for my mama to fetch me. And i fail at serving. and the shuttlecock just keeps flying over to her neighbour's house. (which is ziting's aunt's house. HAHA)
and now im back home spamming myself with fanfics :)
shall do homework at night, idk why but i do things more efficiently at night heh. :)
?You're like a queen and beautiful
3:44 PM
Friday, January 14, 2011
I honestly think its cruel of you to tell the counsellor...
I mean, it's not like she wants to like you? Yeah, I guess she's still young and stuff, and i might be a supporter of the LGBT comm, but that is not the main point why i think its bad. It's not like the counsellor will not take action, maybe she wouldn't but the probability she wouldn't is like i dont know. 1? haha, math is annoying. anyway, yeah, it's just that kind of feeling, i think i know how it feels like. why would i not? Just i wouldn't know how bad she'd be hurting if a teacher/counsellor comes up to her and talk to her about it.
-.
school's finally over for the week.
its 9.20 and my eyes are closing already. so is this how being sec 4 is like?
MSND for the last lesson of the last day of the week, made me feel like this is all a dream.
What if we wake up one day, and realise that our life is just a play? but who is watching us then? I guess we'll never know the answer. My life would be a really boring play though.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
9:13 PM
Thursday, January 13, 2011
So motherfucking tired.
its 12 now, and im still awake. on a school day.
Perhaps its extremely normal for other people but for me?
Im supposed to sleep at 10/10.30.
at least i cleared most of my homework debt.
now the homework i have, are new homework.
uh, well, i cleared the holiday ones :)
(except from uhm lit, that is not very. uhm. urgent. HAHA.)
WE'LL SEE. WHEN IAN TAN WANTS IT.
i feel too busy. this is bad.
oh well.
t.g.i.f. tomorrow ^^
?You're like a queen and beautiful
11:59 PM
I feel myself, letting go of kpop.
kpop is drama, emo-ness, unfair-ness, tears, depression, hate, anti-fans, bashing, delusion, fake.
but kpop, is also happiness, beautiful smiles, pretty faces, long slender legs, awesome abs, amazing vocals, perfect dancing, talent, fanfics, laughter, friends.
yeah, i've made friends with so many other people through kpop, suju actually ;)
the day i'm leaving the kpop fandom is probably coming soon :)
EDIT: on second thoughts, maybe not. I can't leave the music. heehee.
until i actually find something that can replace my love for kpop, no matter how long i don't update myself, i think im still part of the entire kpop fandom. i think i typed that just now because my mood was swinging. i can feel my endometrium breaking down.~
?You're like a queen and beautiful
5:15 PM
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
my mood these few days can be represented with a big fat
):sigh, i hate my homework debt.
why do i feel so busy everyday, i really think im going to die soon.
why am i so useless -,-
?You're like a queen and beautiful
10:59 PM
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
I've accumulated a homework debt that is impossible to repay, unlike the oxygen debt.
During this morning's assembly, cws was talking about what employers are looking for and what uni entrance exams, you give them your straight As also no use.
Ya right, i dont even have straight As.
I don't even know what to hope for now.
is hoping for 10points and below too little. or what.
6 points is just impossible or something for me.
Tang is just annoying. what we get A1 for chinese Os is kao yun qi.
go and die la.
yeah, sure i'm one of those that didnt study alot and still got my A1 for chinese Os. okay, so i won't get a distinction for my hcl Os? if i really don't it must be your fault too, for being so freaking encouraging. sarcasm intended.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
8:00 PM
Monday, January 10, 2011
Oh yeah baby, A1, dist for oral for normal chinese o levels :))))))))))))
I was surprisingly calm when i received the result slip and saw my results, I didn't scream or whatever like those cute people in my cohort. the screams are scarier than the crying seriously. I was damn freaking scared though when tang gave me the evil eye before passing me my result slip :/
I LOVE YOU SN. YOU'RE THE BESTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.
TOP SCORER AGAIN.
3RD YEAR ALREADY. OMG. WE PWN LA.
<3!!!
feeling sad for the people that cried so badly, when they got A2 ):<
its okay yknow. although saying 'its okay' doesnt work when they are crying like shit. and i suck so much at consoling people all i did was hug her and say nothing ):< and run to find tissue for her. ): (although we laughed at the end because (someone) was crying super loudly, it was rather amusing. SORRY. WE SHOULDN'T HAVE LAUGHED. BUT ITS REALLY DAMN FUNNY. everyone cried silently and stuff then HAHAHAHA. OKAY NEVER MIND.
Our cohort did really well though! 83.7% distinction! and msg 1.56 i think! We are the awesome :) NEXT YEAR SOMEONE NEED TO GET 11A1S AGAIN. YAAAAAAAAAY :)
?You're like a queen and beautiful
6:42 PM
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Can't believe I fell asleep at 11pm last night, a friday night.
Amazing. I didn't even on the computer. Well, I reached home at 10pm though.
I forgot how to do matrix multiplication after a day and jezminz almost killed me cause i asked like idk how many times in 5 minutes. HAHAHAHHA.
I had troubles falling asleep for the whole week, I go to bed around like 10 at night and end up falling asleep around 1am. what is this. then i end up sleeping so little. then i still had like amath tuition yesterday. After a year without tuition, amath tuition now just kills all my braincells. I have a whole lot of homework undone. mainly cause i didn't do the holiday homework during the holidays but whatever. I went back to school immediately after like my tuition, to interview the parents/teachers/students about like the ip stuff, and i was just totally .... ing. oh well. played around with alex teoh's drums, was quite fun. ahaha.
CCA fair today was fun, but not as fun as last year though.
Reached school at 9.30 although my shift only starts at 10. went around sticking stickers, but the sec 1s this year are just plain weird. they don't want sweets, don't want souvenirs, don't want stickers. also don't know what they want la. talked with this two sec 3s again, clarissa and theresa, from like hua hui i think. those two that asked me to join hua hui last year cause they thought i was a sec 1. they're so cute. HAHA.
the year has just started, and im feeling so tired already.
this sucks.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
1:43 PM
Thursday, January 6, 2011
I hate the way I am so fucking much.
I hate the way I get so comfortable with some people, I show my affection, or whatever you want to call it, by stuff that makes it seem as if I don't like them anymore. I hate how I'm so careful with some of my closest friends. I hate how I'm so fucking short. so fucking fat. so fucking dumb. I hate how my life revolves around kpop, when i leave it, I don't what to do anymore. I hate how I procrastinate so much. I hate how I act as if I don't care, I don't feel anything, when in fact, I'm very much affected. I hate how I don't say anything about it and people assume that I'm okay with it. I hate how I'm sec 4, and i know nothing about secondary 3 math. I hate how I hate crying, because I try to hold my tears back, and I still end up crying under my blanket, my pillow getting wet. I hate how I think that I'm alone, that no one will be there for me. I hate how I think that people say 'I love you.' for fun, I don't exactly take it seriously.
I hate myself, honestly, sometimes I wonder, why do people make friends with me.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
8:44 PM
3RD DAY OF SCHOOL.
I'm updating because my deskpartner thinks that i update everyday. HAHA.
Jasmine are you feeling sad i referred to you as my deskpartner HAHAHAHAHA.
My stamina all gone already after 2 months of doing nothing but watching dramas and sleeping. Ran 2 rounds for pe today and after that i felt like i ran 6 rounds or something -,-
AND ANNA LEONG FREAKING SHRUNK ME. SHE TOOK AWAY MY PRECIOUS 0.5 CM. you don't know how precious 0.5 cm is to me, you're not 151.5cm tall. IDC IM 151.5 ):<
I don't get why everyone around me are growing taller, BUT IM NOT. even the already tall people are still growing taller. i think my growth spurt was like 3cm or something. pathetic. ITS OKAY. I SHALL BE LIKE LIANE AND EMBRACE MY HEIGHT. ):
and i gained one kg. thanks. im surrounded by tall and skinny people. i feel so,,,, idk.
I like mrs hoo :)
she's so nice, i like everything about her, except for the fact that she pronounces everything with a 't' at the back. and she cant pronouce hydrogen.
I keep feeling like my soul is out of my body or something when im school. I keep thinking that I'm not supposed to be in school, and everything around me are not real. Like I'm still sleeping and this is my dream or something, but its reality. I THINK MSND AFFECTED ME. i cant differentiate illusions and reality anymore. oh wow -,- AND I NAMED MY SOUL LIU JIAJIA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. (inside joke. i think only jasmine understands. laugh) I can just stare into space and then just sit up straight all of a sudden wondering why i was staring into space. I can laugh like crazy and then focus totally after that. Why am i so weird.
Alright, i shall try to finish my amath holiday homework :)
-.
/edited.
I HATE YOU MATH. I hate you so much. You ruin my life ):<
Why oh why, do you exist.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
4:55 PM
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
ITS THE FIRST DAY OF BEING A SEC 4, AND I STILL DONT FEEL LIKE IM A SEC 4.
I FEEL QUITE PROUD OF MYSELF THOUGH, I ONLY CAME ONLINE AFTER FINISHING WORK HEH. ALTHOUGH THE WORK IS LIKE OVERDUE WORK ):<
OH WELL. :)
I FEEL QUITE HAPPY.
?You're like a queen and beautiful
7:36 PM
Monday, January 3, 2011
In a few hours time, i'ld be sleeping in the car. wishing that the road to school will be that bit longer.
I'll probably wake up to some familiar music and start singing along, getting off the car unwillingly, and walking to my new class. It's on level 1, i think im supposed to feel happy that i don't have to climb all the way up everyday, but i'm not happy. i'm afraid. this means that, i might not go to wisdom everyday to talk with ziting and amanda. i fear for the day where we will drift apart. i. dont. want. that. ever. ziting said that melody asked her to go for recess with them and she agreed, what can i say? 2011 is filled with uncertainty. I dont know what's in store for me. I am tired of being motivated, doing my best, and not getting back what i should get in turn for my efforts. almost every year, i lose some friends. please dont let this happen this year. please don't. I'll sleep in about 20 minutes, since i have to wake up at 6. ahahaha. I'll try harder this year. I promised sonia i'll get my mum to lock my computer, and only check akp, kpopsecrets, sapphirepearls, beastattack, hyukhae, miracle, and whatever websites only on saturdays... That is actually taking away my life, i honestly do not know since when my life revolved around kpop only, perhaps since last year. At least i have my ipod with me. and there is no space left, i had to take out all the chinese and jap songs to make space for kpop. i just hope things will change for the better :)
?You're like a queen and beautiful
8:00 PM
I MUST BE MOTIVATED TO DO WELL NEXT YEAR.
YES I MUST.
LET'S HOPE I CAN STICK TO MY RESOLUTION FOR AT LEAST A WEEK :D
2011 is a new beginning.
holiday homework belongs to 2010 :D
(great excuse for not doing it right. :))
?You're like a queen and beautiful
1:36 AM
Saturday, January 1, 2011
WHY AM I AWAKE NOW AT THIS TIME OMG.
ITS FREAKING GOING TO BE 5AM SOON. O:
damn, i was rewatching dbsk's champagne. IT WAS FROM 2008. OH MAN. ITS SO FUNNY. i remember i used to have it in my phone then in sec 1 cause i still had to sleep early back then like 9pm? oh wow. haha. then i would hide under my blanket and watch try not to laugh out loud. sigh. and i used to have only one dbsk poster up on my wall. and it was from some magazine somemore. laugh.
they showed gda on tv just now i was like omfg why the shit are they showing that but yeah. suju's just perfect. and omg at the end i saw scenes that i didnt see on youtube videos that are like so freaking cute. beast and suju were hugging each other!!! yoseob and leeteuk omg! so love<3 Was watching mbc's gayo daejun live just now. haha.
i think i should go and sleep now omg. what is this. HAHA.
I'm too tired to type sungmin's dedication now, so i shall do it later. :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUNGMIN I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.
HAPPY NEW YEAR:)
?You're like a queen and beautiful
4:47 AM
